Bird chirps.

Laying in bed the past couple nights I have developed an interesting way of telling the time without looking at a clock. I know you are all on the edges on your seats right now. I hope this wasn't developed by ancient tribes in the past because I feel I'm going to copyright my idea it will be known as "the cheapest clock in the world"

I usually get into bed around 10 P.M. At this time I hear birds chirping. I call this chirp the "fairytale chirp". Its so peaceful and musical and puts me straight to sleep.

Around 2 A.M I get woken up to a more harsh chirp. I call this chirp the "food chirp". This is when the birds are starting to fight about where they are going to get their bread crumbs. I know at this time that I have about seven more hours of sleep.

6 A.M. I call this the "hell chirp". I don't know what these birds are doing but they are getting into huge arguments and its probably the worst noise that I have ever heard. Sometimes when I'm really irritated I tell the birds to "shut up" It does not work, but it never hurts to try.

10 A.M..this is the "vacation chirp". The birds are really quiet at this time, so I think that they are all on a vacation.

And the cycle starts over at 10 P.M

So ditch your swatches, and Rolexs and rely on mother nature.